Once, in a magical land called Kalos, know for it's horribly mutated wildlife, there lived a cat Pokémon named espurr. It wasn't like other Pokémon, because it had really wide eyes and didn't blink often. Nobody really wanted to use espurr, because it had a stat total of 355, and it evolved at level 25, so espurr was depressed. When the Christmas season rolled around, espurr was on its mountain top, mad at all the whos down in whoville, muttering about how much it hated Christmas. Then, espurr got a wonderful idea. It cold go down into the town, and use it's psychic powers to blow up the entire town, one house at a time. Even better, it could use a ditto to create more copies of itself, and wipe whoville off the map with one ear lift. As espurr went and caught a ditto, it laughed about the town that was about to become ruins. However, when espurr got back, there was someone in its cave. Espurr looked in its living room, and found a doge sleeping on the couch. Espurr got angry, and hissed at the doge. The doge got up, and prepared to attack, but before it could, Espurr used "Espurr Intesifies." In response, the doge used "Wow Intesifies." They both intesified for a good minute, and then they attacked. The attacks collided, and an explosion blew up the mountain, and dug a hole 37,000 yards straight down, and made a new hole on Mars. When the dust settled, espurr looked at the doge, and realized that it had wide eyes, just like Espurr. Espurr went over, and apoligized. The doge said
"Wow
Such Kindness
Very love
So Wide eyes
Doge luv grei cate"
Then, doge and espurr went off to Sinnoh, celebrating Christmas as friends.
{{video|A Very Espurr Christmas by Mai Sentry (Trollpasta)|A reading of this pasta}}